By Amy Demyan, Ph.D.

If any experience in adulthood were to produce a period of openness to new learning and to stimulate new coping strategies, parenting must be a prime candidate. Newman & Newman, 1988

Some researches describe successful aging as a balance between stability and change, and, if there’s one thing that pretty much requires change to your life, it’s parenting.  It seems lately many of my friends and family have embarked on the journey of parenthood, and as a non-parent I’ve pondered the ways in which their lives are changing, recalling my childhood days growing up with 3 younger sisters.  I’ve also wondered how I can best support their experience and maintain a relationship with them despite parents’ jam-packed schedule.

Gift Ideas: As a brand new aunt twice over I can’t tell you how much I have gotten into spoiling all the new little ones with adorable outfits and baby-related paraphernalia. Baby clothes are a great gift for new parents. They can always use new clothes for their ever growing baby. A tip is to make sure you’re buying baby clothes that fit the baby’s age and the season.  If the baby is 3 months old In August, and you want to buy an outfit that’s labeled 6 months, consider that it will be November/December and make sure you’re buying appropriate (warm-wintery) outfits for those months. I recommend shopping at TJ Maxx or Marshall’s stores for great, name-brand outfits at discounted prices.  I mean, why drop a bundle when they only wear it for a couple of months!

Blankets don’t always make the best gifts. Parents are advised against using blankets in their baby’s crib due to SIDS until somewhere around 12 months and sometimes later, so I’d avoid giving a blanket as a gift unless you’ve handmade it or it has special meaning.  Gift cards to stores like Babies r Us or Target make great gifts and are especially handy when parents need to make an emergency diaper run. And, speaking of which, babies need about 10 diaper changes a day, so diapers are a gift that will always be appreciated.  Check out Nature Baby Care’s eco-friendly diapers and related products and note that diaper sizes are based on the baby’s weight. 

Try to fight the urge to buy too many toys for the little ones of your friends & family. Instead, focus on educational and creative-type child gifts and minimize toy-giving because so many parents are in constant battle with child-related clutter in their home. Also, consider giving homemade coupons for free baby-sitting as a gift that gives respite for your friends & family who are parents, but only give them if you’re willing to follow through!

Lastly, tips from my sis and new mom Nicole on how to be a kid-friendly friend include first make sure you wash or sanitize your hands before holding a baby.  Second, depending on the baby’s age, make sure you offer consistent support to the baby’s neck and head. Also, unless otherwise noted, stay near the parents while holding their baby. Lastly, and most importantly, enjoy your role as the cool auntie or uncle!